I recently stumbled across the twitter account @MensMovementCom for the website, www.mensmovement.com , and after checking them out I gave them a follow. They graciously followed me back and I started chatting with one of the admins today, David. I signed up for a free account and immediately was intrigued with the work they do to help guys all over the world, from all walks of life, ages, and backgrounds.
They offer support groups, forums, and a blog which immediately caught my eye. There are all types of topics that the members have written about, from self help, to book sharing, movie reviews, app reviews, poetry, you name it. So me being someone who enjoys writing and having a blog of my own, I had the idea to submit my story of survival and healing from childhood sexual abuse and the PTSD, Dissociation, Anxiety, Flashbacks, and Depression that comes from it all.
After I decided I was going to submit my story, I immediately got a knot in my stomach, and a feeling of “what in the hell are you doing Lyric?” Do you really want to put yourself out there on a self help community for guys and be that vulnerable?
That may sound totally silly, and it probably is considering what I write about here this blog all the time. I can’t really pinpoint why posting up my story got me nervous and having second thoughts, it just did. I decided to power through the emotional mind process and use wise mind to realize that this can be a big step towards bringing more awareness about CSA and how it affects men too. I then began to feel like I had a duty, an obligation to tell my story and just maybe it would help others too. Even if it doesn’t right away, some day down the road who knows who it might help.
So I submitted my story and David approved it earlier today and you can find my post there on the blog.
Life as a guy living with PTSD, Anxiety, and Dissociation from a history of childhood sexual abuse.
I hope you’ll take a few minutes to give it a read and see what else the site has to offer in support of men across the world. The way I see it, we are all in this healing journey together as both men and women. CSA is a horrific, terrible thing for anyone to suffer through but by bringing awareness we can hopefully end the stigma some day. We can all do our part to encourage everyone to reach out and seek the help we need and deserve to live the life we so desperately want.
-Lyric
I’m giving this a “THUMBS UP” Hooray for courage!
Thanks so much Don, you rock man! I really don’t know why I was so apprehensive about telling my story in this manner. I mean I talk about it all the time in my blog and in survivor chats, but I guess I don’t really lay it on the line and pull it altogether, so to speak, as much as I do in that post. Hopefully this encourages more people to reach out and seek help!
Thank you so much for that post on men’s movement. I have Dissociative Identity Disorder, and the way you describe your dissociation is so similar to the way I experience it! I also have to reread paragraphs. Did you create alter identities to contain your traumatic memories or is it more like you simply locked them up in another part of your mind?
Hi Joy, thank you so much for the comment! For me, I didn’t create alter identities, at least I don’t think I do. I think of it more as my brain is a big closet and I put the trauma memories into a shoe box and tossed it on the floor of the closet, then piled 30 years worth of memories on top of it so I wouldn’t have to think about it and deal with it. Then that one day in therapy something triggered me and all those memories were pushed aside leaving that box wide open. So now I try to understand everything that’s coming to light and it gets quite frustrating since I’m a thinker and have an analytical brain.
I would love to hear more about how you cope with your DID and maybe we can learn from and help each other. 🙂